Kunitzer in China

I got my Chinese driver’s license several weeks ago. Although I was quite certain that I wasn’t going to buy or lease a car, I at least wanted to have the freedom to get a car. I think it’s this possibility of freedom that had me endure the hassles it took to get my driver’s license.

On paper, the process seems quite simple – take your driver’s license from home country + two passport photos + your passport to the local police station and take a test on the computer with the assistance of a Chinese “support” person. Mr. Qi is the boss of the company drivers and he is also the guy at my company who coordinates all the paperwork and schedules the appointments at the police station. Passport: no problem. Two passport photos: no problem (I had the foresight to bring about 20 extra passport photos from USA). Driver’s license from USA: no problem. Everything else: Problems!

The first sign of problems was learning that I needed to find my own Chinese “support” person. Basically, a Chinese “support” person is a local Chinese person who had recently passed the written exam for the driver’s license. Getting this support was a problem because I didn’t know anybody that had passed the written exam, but Mr. Qi knew everybody at my company who had passed the written exam, it just wasn’t his responsibility to organize this support. Although I tried to find a support person, I showed up at Mr. Qi’s office on test day without a support person. Fortunately, he says it’s not a problem and I can just use another colleague’s support person because there were three other colleagues who would be taking the test with me. And, he said, I owed him 100RMB (US$12.50) for the fee to get my USA driver’s license translated to Chinese.

Despite the 100RMB setback, things seemed to be going quite well. We arrived at the police station an since we were all foreigners, we went straight to the front of the line. We quickly learned that this wasn’t the line to take the test, but the line to get our picture taken (so tell me why I needed to provide two passport photos) and shell out another 75RMB (US$ 9.37). We then went to the front of the next line, only to find out this wasn’t the line to take the test either, but was the line to pay for the physical exam and shell out another 60RMB (US$7.50).

I am not quite certain why it is called a physical exam because the only thing we had to do was take one of those tests that check for color blindness, the kind of test that has some red circles in the shape of a number and are surrounded by a bunch of green circles. My test showed a number 7, so I said “Seven”. My guess is the lady giving me the test can’t speak a lick of English, but still she says “Hao de” (which means “OK”) and gives my paperwork to the next lady who stamps it about twenty times. I was left with the impression that we were given the abbreviated test and perhaps there is more to this physical exam for the Chinese.

We then went to the next line (again the front) and this time we paid 300RMB (US$37.50), but this was the last line and the only thing left to do was to take the written exam. The test was administered by computer and there was only one computer designated for taking the test, so we could only take the test one by one. I drew the longest straw, so I had to go last.

“Normally” the foreigner will sit with the “support” person in front of the computer because the test is “normally” administered in Chinese and the “support” person “supports” the foreigner in translating the questions and the multiple choice answers. Things started off “normally” until the police officer decided he didn’t like the way the “support” was given. The police officer stopped the test and made the first person take the English version of the test, but still let the Chinese “support” person remain. Through a combination of bad Chinese to English translations on the test, nervousness of the “support” person, and 50% of the test questions more about license administration instead of driving skills, the first person failed the test. This means the first person gets no license. To make matters worse, the police officer decided that since the first person failed, we all failed.

We all had some choice words. Most of them were four letter words. Because we spent nearly the entire day at the police office. Because we all dropped 535RMB (US$66.87) without a refund. Because we didn’t get to take the test the “normal” way. Because the police officer arbitrarily (and, I believe, capriciously) failed us all. Because Mr. Qi didn’t do anything to prepare us for this. Because we are all better drivers than the Chinese. Because even if the Chinese pass the test the Chinese don’t follow the rules of the road anyway. Because we still didn’t have a driver’s license. Not that it we would really need or use our Chinese driver’s license, it was just the principle that others got it the “normal” way and we should too.

Some weeks later, Mr. Qi worked out a deal with the police department. Three police officers came to my company along with three computers for taking the test. This was unprecedented for the police to take such action. So unprecedented that a local newspaper reporter came to write a story about the good relationship between my company and the police department and how well my company and the police station were working together to make things just a little more convenient for us foreigners. The reporter even interviewed one of my colleagues about how my company prepared us to take such a test. Naturally, my colleague replied that since training materials are only available in Chinese, we worked with a translator for several weeks to study and learn and review. He said it was a great effort of my company to provide such a service and that he felt fully prepared to take the exam.

Things finally returned to “normal”. The reporter soon left. The two higher ranking police officers soon left. Mr. Qi and the low ranking police officer soon went outside to smoke cigarettes. And the rest of us took the test with the “support” person at our side. I got a 94% - the way it is “normally” done.